Ego is neither good nor bad. Ego is false.You cannot reach the truth without passing through falsehood, for there is no other way to perceive the truth directly. When a child is born, he is not aware of himself. He does not see himself as a body or mind or any such entity. It is through his senses that his awareness grows and he creates his identity.All his senses open outward, whether it is sight, touch or smell. Through these, he develops a concept of himself that contrasts with the outside world.There is no way for him to know his own self.
Usually, a child’s first encounter is with his mother and through her he becomes aware of his own body.Thus a centre is born, which is in reference with the world outside, in this case, the mother. If the mother caresses the child and treats him with love, the child feels loved. If the mother rejects him, the child feels he is worthless.This is how his concept of self develops.This concept of self which is based on perceptions by the outside world is ‘ego.’ It is not our reality,but is the image of ourselves that is based on how we are treated by the outside world.
It is a reflected awareness. Hence, it is false. Gradually, this centre becomes the kingpin. If you go to school, your teacher perceives you in a certain way. If you have friends, they have opinions about you.When your parents interact with you, they express their opinion about you.Everybody adds something to how you perceive yourself and it gets reinforced day after day.You start living your life from this centre and believe it to be yourself.
Thus, when someone suggests that you drop your ego,you cannot.You cannot drop your ego, but it can drop by itself. It’s just like a leaf of a tree.When it matures, it drops by itself without causing any damage to the tree. But if you try to remove a fresh leaf from a tree,you will damage it. Our ego or self-image is our social need. If we have a healthy ego,we behave appropriately in society,whereas, a weak or an ill-formed ego makes us behave either as a victim or a victimiser. All that comes to the conscious from the unconscious passes through the filter of the ego. If this filter is not strong and healthy, then all kinds of desires and wishes will come to your conscious mind and will confuse you.Your pleasures are false and so are your sufferings. They all relate to a centre that is not your own and this centre demands a lot, and therefore, you have to give it constant attention.So you make efforts to get attention. It’s like trying to feel the fragrance of an artificial flower. However beautiful an artificial flower may be, you always know it’s not real. Your ego helps you get success in this world, hence, you are always attached to it. However, a slight turn of events can change everything and leave you confused.
In the Mahabharata,Arjuna got confused in the beginning of a battle that was most crucial for him. You were always in the state of ‘being’ before your birth and will return to it again after your death.This state of being is your true centre.The moment you are free of your false centre, you are in the space of your being.And that is true freedom, your home. No suffering can bother you in this centre because it is irrelevant in the space of being. The wise try to make you understand, but your false centre blocks your vision.You have to just explore a little more and see the false as false. By this very ‘seeing’, ego becomes transparent and loses its grip over you.Then ups and downs of life will not affect you.
Usually, a child’s first encounter is with his mother and through her he becomes aware of his own body.Thus a centre is born, which is in reference with the world outside, in this case, the mother. If the mother caresses the child and treats him with love, the child feels loved. If the mother rejects him, the child feels he is worthless.This is how his concept of self develops.This concept of self which is based on perceptions by the outside world is ‘ego.’ It is not our reality,but is the image of ourselves that is based on how we are treated by the outside world.
It is a reflected awareness. Hence, it is false. Gradually, this centre becomes the kingpin. If you go to school, your teacher perceives you in a certain way. If you have friends, they have opinions about you.When your parents interact with you, they express their opinion about you.Everybody adds something to how you perceive yourself and it gets reinforced day after day.You start living your life from this centre and believe it to be yourself.
Thus, when someone suggests that you drop your ego,you cannot.You cannot drop your ego, but it can drop by itself. It’s just like a leaf of a tree.When it matures, it drops by itself without causing any damage to the tree. But if you try to remove a fresh leaf from a tree,you will damage it. Our ego or self-image is our social need. If we have a healthy ego,we behave appropriately in society,whereas, a weak or an ill-formed ego makes us behave either as a victim or a victimiser. All that comes to the conscious from the unconscious passes through the filter of the ego. If this filter is not strong and healthy, then all kinds of desires and wishes will come to your conscious mind and will confuse you.Your pleasures are false and so are your sufferings. They all relate to a centre that is not your own and this centre demands a lot, and therefore, you have to give it constant attention.So you make efforts to get attention. It’s like trying to feel the fragrance of an artificial flower. However beautiful an artificial flower may be, you always know it’s not real. Your ego helps you get success in this world, hence, you are always attached to it. However, a slight turn of events can change everything and leave you confused.
In the Mahabharata,Arjuna got confused in the beginning of a battle that was most crucial for him. You were always in the state of ‘being’ before your birth and will return to it again after your death.This state of being is your true centre.The moment you are free of your false centre, you are in the space of your being.And that is true freedom, your home. No suffering can bother you in this centre because it is irrelevant in the space of being. The wise try to make you understand, but your false centre blocks your vision.You have to just explore a little more and see the false as false. By this very ‘seeing’, ego becomes transparent and loses its grip over you.Then ups and downs of life will not affect you.
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